當(dāng)你跟別人發(fā)生分歧的時(shí)候，你會(huì)怎么處理? 是裝做沒有事情發(fā)生? 是自己生悶氣? 是就此跟朋友絕交? 還是跟對(duì)方坐下來(lái)好好談?wù)劊�努力解決分歧呢? 如果你選擇最后一個(gè)解決方案，Bingo! 這就是我們今天要教的習(xí)慣用語(yǔ)：Clear the air.

　　To clear the air 清除兩人間不愉快的氣氛，其實(shí)就是“消除隔閡”的意思。每次我要是和朋友有什么不愉快我都會(huì)這么做，clear the air. 坦誠(chéng)地談?wù)剢栴}，其實(shí)你們會(huì)發(fā)現(xiàn)，沒有什么是不能解決的。說(shuō)到這，你是不是也有寫電子郵件被誤解的時(shí)候? 下面的例子里，一個(gè)領(lǐng)導(dǎo)要告訴我們，如果下屬誤解了他的郵件他會(huì)怎么做，讓我們來(lái)聽聽看：

　　"One of my assistants got really upset with me over an e-mail I wrote her. She felt that I was criticizing her for not doing her job right. But my intent was to offer some helpful suggestions. I've invited her out for coffee this afternoon. I'd like to CLEAR THE AIR. I'm hoping to explain what I meant, so that she doesn't feel upset anymore."

　　[這段話是說(shuō): 因?yàn)槲覍懙囊环怆娮余]件，我的一名助理很不高興。她以為我是在批評(píng)她工作做得不好，但實(shí)際上我只是想給她提一些建議。我邀請(qǐng)她下午一起去喝咖啡。我想跟她消除隔閡，解釋一下我真正的意思，希望她不再難過(guò)了。]

　　這就是為什么我對(duì)寫email特別小心。很多時(shí)候一個(gè)詞，你寫的是一個(gè)意思，別人看就是另一種語(yǔ)氣。所以對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō)，I prefer face-to-face conversation over e-mail. 比起電子郵件，我更喜歡面對(duì)面的談話。

　　上面我們說(shuō)到消除隔閡，其實(shí)，家庭成員之間的關(guān)系特別微妙，也特別難控制。由于接觸的太多，我們很多時(shí)候可能不經(jīng)意就傷害了自己在乎的人。下面就是這樣一個(gè)例子，我們來(lái)聽一聽:

　　"When mom asked me if she could move in with me after dad died, I told her I needed to think about it. It's not that I don't love her. It's just that I live so far away that she wouldn't be able to see her friends or enjoy her life like before. Fortunately, over dinner last night, we CLEARED THE AIR. She realized that her happiness is very important to me."

　　[這段話是說(shuō): 爸爸過(guò)世后，媽媽問我能不能搬來(lái)和我一起住。我告訴她我需要考慮一下。其實(shí)，我不是不愛媽媽，而是我住得太遠(yuǎn)，搬來(lái)跟我一起住，她就沒法像以前那樣去見朋友，像以前那樣享受生活了。還好，昨天吃晚飯時(shí)我們消除了隔閡。她意識(shí)到，她的快樂對(duì)我來(lái)說(shuō)是非常重要的。]

　　真高興聽到這母女倆能消除隔閡。在很多文化里，子女是要照顧年長(zhǎng)的父母的。但其實(shí)，有時(shí)候讓老人離開她熟悉的環(huán)境并不是一件好事。Both parties should be willing to have a frank conversation, it could save everyone from CLEARING THE AIR later on. 雙方應(yīng)該開誠(chéng)布公地談?wù)劊�這樣日后就不用再去消除隔閡了。